I Shoot Porn: You just worked the glory hole at The Champagne Room. Now we’re back to my studio to make more smut. What’s your take on the glory hole?

Sarah Vandella: I love glory holes! To me, they’re the dirtiest act I can imagine. It’s so taboo. You don’t know who’s on the other side of that hole, so the anonymity of it makes it so hot. It’s something I would jerk to if I was watching porn! When I was a kid, I was very into masturbation. The first visual I ever masturbated to was a picture of Jay Leno! Can you believe that? I had a newspaper clipping of Jay!

ISP: Why Jay Leno?

SV: Something about his chin really turned me on. When I was a kid, I wore braces, and at I had to wear head gear. I used to lay on my belly to masturbate, and I was rubbing one out to Jay’s pic, and I’m about to cum, and I knew I was either gonna cum — or break my head gear. Sure enough, it broke, so the next morning I had to make up a lie to my mom about how I broke my head gear. I remember the orgasm effect, though…even though I was young! It broke my headgear!

ISP: Let’s talk about your whorish ways.

SV: Well, I pretty much got started escorting about a year out of college, and, you know, out of school I worked regular jobs, and I hated it. So I decided to use my looks — and my sexuality — to make some money. I remember looking in the Yellow Pages for local strip clubs! I was so naive! Plus I was shy, and I had low self-esteem, so I really wasn’t promiscuous. I just didn’t think I was sexy, or that I could turn men on. But I got up the courage to go to try out. The club was a total peep show, like the one I just shot in with you, and we did “extras” there.

ISP: Extras?

SV: We did blow jobs for $200. A hand job went for $80. The guys always wore condoms.

ISP: Was there any sex in The Champagne Room?

SV: At first, no. The owner was very careful. He didn’t want to go to jail. He knew the club was already pushing it. Anyways, I worked there a month, and I knew there were legal brothels in Nevada, so the next thing you know I was at Sherry’s Ranch in Nevada.

ISP: So you love your work.

SV: I loved it! I got a little taste, and I wanted more! The girls at the Strip Joint didn’t understand it when I left for Sherry’s, but it was all about loving sex.

ISP: So how did you segue that into porn?

SV: It’s not like I always wanted to be a porn star. But I did always want to be a whore. As a kid, I didn’t want to be Jenna Jameson, it was all about expressing myself sexually. Some of the girls at the brothel did scenes, and I decided to call some of the agents in LA, and, over a six month time frame, I asked all sorts of questions. And I thought about it. I kept escorting, and one day I just felt ready. So I came to LA, shot for Naughty America, and finally fell into my current agent. I’ve been doing it now for about a year.

ISP: What went through your head as you were signing your very first model release?

SV: Oh, god! I was so nervous. I just felt dumb. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know where to look. I didn’t want to sound like someone else. It took a little while for me to be comfortable on camera, and to know how to open up for the camera, and how to really work it! But the first two weeks I didn’t have a clue.

ISP: If I opened your fridge right now, what am I gonna find?

SV: I don’t have a fridge. That’s not a good question for me, cause I travel so much. I have three rental cars, but I don’t have a fridge.

ISP: Were you popular in high school?

SV: No, not at all. I was a total dork. I played sports and kept to myself.

ISP: What sports did you play?

SV: Soccer.

ISP: Were you a problem child growing up?

SV: Yes. Very much. I was a bad kid. I just never fit in, and I was always made fun of. In school I was rebellious. I would always talk back to teachers because I was bullied all the time. I felt the kids didn’t have to right to talk shit about me, and even the teachers were idiots.

ISP: What’s your sex life like off camera, and when you’re not escorting?

SV: For the past two years, I haven’t gotten any dick! Not unless there’s a camera around. I never get laid if I’m not working! Guys never ask me out. They don’t like me. I don’t know if they think I’m super bitch or what!

ISP: What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done without a camera rolling or getting paid?

SV: (Thinks for a second). OK! This is a true story. I hit on my massage therapist a couple years ago. He totally freaked, but not in a bad way. He had a girlfriend at the time, but he was in the middle of a transition, so to speak. He was so shy! He started sweating! It was so cute! I was making him nervous. I asked him to suck dick and to fuck. He was so nervous and flustered and he said, “listen, you’re hot, but I’ve got a girlfriend!” So, I flashed him. I couldn’t help myself. He freaked out and we didn’t do anything.

ISP: That’s not really a crazy story!

SV: I know! It’s not! I’m sorry. Oh wait — here’s one. When I was 12, and I just got my first period, I was very curious about sex and dick sucking. So, I decided to go up to a random stranger and ask to blow him. And I didn’t even ask for money! What was I going to do with money at 12?

ISP: Um, how old was he?

SV: He was in his 30’s. It was almost pedophilia. I mean he wasn’t old…but he was an adult. I blew him in the bushes, and he was coaching me on what to do. Then I started getting scared, so I left. I left him in the bushed with his pants around his ankles. I remember him saying where are you going? when I walked away. I was also a huge flasher when I was a kid.

ISP: OK — that’s crazy! And I’m pretty sure when a 12 year old blows an older man, they call it pedophilia. Anyways…on to other things — your bacon: well done n’ crispy or soft n’ chewy?

SV: Well done and crispy! Gonna cook me some bacon?

ISP: Orange chicken or Moo Goo Gai Pan?

SV: I’ll take the second one. What is it?

ISP: The Beatles or Brittney?

SV: Oh! The Beatles!! Are you crazy?! I play the guitar. I had a Fender Jagstang, which was a combo Mustang and Jaguar. Curt Kobain designed it for Fender when he was still alive. It was a 16th birthday present from my dad.

ISP: Are you close to your parents?

SV: Yes, I am. They’re still married. They know everything about me. When I started dancing, I told them. When I started escorting, I told them.

ISP: What was their reaction?

SV: Well, you have to understand…it started with dancing, so by the time I was doing porn, they knew everything. It was never a shock to them. I knew from the day I started dancing I was going to make a career out of the adult industry, and they support me with that decision. Most girls do this on the DL. This is my favorite job, and it’s my career, and I’m proud of it.

ISP: Your thoughts on the butt hole?

SV: I love it! I have a little freckle on mine. It winks. I just started doing anal in my private life, and I like it. The first time I did it up the butt it went right in, and I liked it! I don’t know if I can handle big guys, yet, but one day. My aspiration is to do a DP.

ISP: Do you myspace?

SV: I have a myspace. Be my friend!

ISP: If I’m your friend, does that mean I get a BJ?

SV: Of course! What are friends for?