But before I tell you all about S.S. and Dogfart and the secret mansion, I think I’ll tell you about Brandi Lyons. Cause this is a fun story, and it’s Monday, and Mondays are all about fun, right?

Spunkmouth Brandi Lyons. A classic scene, for a number of reasons…most of which are behind the camera, and you’d never hear about…unless you’re an ISP reader.

The Spunk budget was getting low, and I really wanted to shoot another scene. Problem was the budget was so low, I couldn’t afford a scene AND studio time; in fact, shooting a scene and even getting a hotel room was looking kinda dim. I was booking Brandi Lyons, cause she puts on a great scene, and whoever gave me her number said she was awesome to shoot. So I tell Brandi my situation, and she says “Why not come over to my apartment?!”

There ya go. Problem solved. But this is where shit got kinda weird.

We all show up – myself and the male talent – and are greeting by Brandi’s husband. It was awkward, yep. But guess who Brandi’s bigget fan is? Yep…all her DVD’s and videotapes are on his bookshelf, and I guess if you’re truly in love with someone, it really doesn’t matter what they do for a living, right? Well…except maybe murder and mayhem.

Half way through the shoot Brandi asks if I’d like some A. This means would I like it if she got slammed in the butt. A is for anal. I kind of nod and say “sure Brandi, but I really am pushing it with my budget. I mean I simply can’t afford to pay you more.”

“Um, ok,” she replied. “How about we make a deal?”

This makes me nervous. But I’m all ears.

And we come to a deal. Pay her now for the scene before it ends, and she’ll give me the A for free. Why pay her now? Well, it’s Saturday, and the bank’s about to close, and they really need to cover some outstanding checks. It’s a place I’ve been at many times, and even though I didn’t feel that great about paying someone before the job was done, I agree. Besides, I’m getting the A.

Boy, did I get A. Lots of A. So much A I can’t even recall the last time I had so much A. A for All Over the Place. A for “Grade A” A, as in gApe. I guess you’d have to look at all the pics in this gallery – or join the site – to see what I mean.

How about that? Cooperation on the porno front. I help Brandi and her hubby cover some bills in time, and in return I get a Whole Lotta A.

Only in Porno Land.