FP writes:

Ok I am average built i guess. Yes i am looking for some quick easy cash. i already work 48 hours a week but its just not cutting it. My name is FP i am 34 years old birthday is 1972 i am in CA. I am a machine operator. 5’4 about 150-160 no i am not fat i am thick mainly in the asset department. No i have never done this before but hell i am tired of these tired as men out here that want ass but dont want the relationship. Hell i love sex so mind as well get paid for it. i am a single mother of 4 and expenses are increasing. so need money now and dont have time for a second full time job. Enclose a few pictures to give you an idea. please get back to me. Believe it or not i am very shy so this is definitely a first, not a druggy nor an alcholic nor a gang banger.

Heya FP!

First off, lemme tell ya, just like Freddie Mercury and the rest of the boys from Queen, I love fat bottom girls!

And of course you love sex, so why not get paid for it!

Amen sister!

How about all those fuckin’ men who want The Ass without The Relationship? (I can count myself as part of that scurvy bunch of bastards!)

Anyways, I get so many e-mails from people who want to get into the business. Most are from dudes, of course, and if I blogged each one of the e-mails some dude sends me (usually with a picture of his dick), I’d have to blog that topic each and every day…and I’d still be months behind.

I’m fairly sure the ones I get from girls are really from boys. Boyfriends. Real and imaginary. Which is to say I think there’s dudes out there who send in pics of their girlsfriends, and their ex-girlfriends, and their imaginary girlfriends, as a way to get off.

And to them I say you poor, poor helpless soul.

If you’re legit, all I can offer is this: getting yourself into dirty movies is a fairly easy task. I’ve sent your pics to an agent who specializes in black girls, and if he takes you on, you should get some work.

Keeping busy working in dirty movies isn’t as easy as getting into them. Besides looks, which is most important, attitude and punctuality goes a long way. In addition, summer is a slow time for the porno biz, so you might want to keep that in mind. Finally, blacks girls just don’t get work like white girls get; I have no idea why.

Good luck though, and lemme know what happens.

(TO ALL THE DUDES WHO HAVE JUST READ THIS BLOG AND AND GETTING READY TO WHIP OUT THEIR CELL PHONE CAMERAS (AND THEIR DICKS) TO SEND ME A PIC — PLEASE DON’T. I CANNOT HELP YOU! REPEAT…I CANNOT HELP YOU. REALLY, I CAN’T. YOU KNOW I’M SERIOUS WHEN I TYPE IN ALL CAPS, TOO…RIGHT? INSTEAD CALL 818 – 709 – 4452 AND GOOD LUCK TO YOU.)