Well, here’s a po-po story.
No, I don’t mean poo-poo, but I could blog about Proxy Paige and poo-poo, cause last night we hung out and watched Salò, or the 120 Days of Sodom. I bought it when Criterion re-released it recently, but I haven’t found the right time to watch it. What a perfect time to watch a movie like Salò during a Porno Princess Slumber Party!
I kinda knew what was going on in it, but I had no idea of the exact scope of its depravity, perversion, and overall foulness.
Have you seen this flick? You mighta heard about it…but damn. Like I said, I knew about it, and its notoriety, and the fact that it’s one of Sasha Gray’s favorites, but, to be honest…it’s off the chart. And the poo-poo eating was too much for me, and I was super tired when I started it so I kinda fell asleep, which is a dumb thing to do when a movie is sub-titled. You can kinda fake it if you know the language, but since I can’t speak Italian, I was out of luck.
Anyways, this is a Po-Po Story, as in the po-lice; cause, this morning, Proxy was following me to the studio in her car, cause she likes watching porno being filmed, and she had nothing to do today, so I told her to come watch me work. Anyways, on the way to the studio, I rolled a stop sign big time. I knew what I was doing as I did it, and the next thing I know it’s the Po-Po, and they’ve pulled me over.
My lawyer once told me the best way to deal with the cops when you get pulled over is it immediately admit what you did and don’t deny. In a friendly, respectful way. Which is exactly what I did.
“Boy did I fuck that one up or what Officer? I’m sorry. I can’t believe I just rolled through that stop sign.”
The cop looked at me kinda incredulously and said, “Yes you did. I need to see your license.”
I handed it over, and since it’s out of state, before it was even in his hands I said, “I live in Arizona and work here. I have to.”
There’s a reason I told him this, and I’d like to credit Wesley Pipes right now. Wesley Pipes is the most dangerous man in porn. I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again. He’s a very dangerous man. And he gets pulled over a lot. He’s told me this. I mean about getting pulled over. I know he’s dangerous, too, cause he’s spent some very hard time in the Pen. He told me about that as well.
“What do you do when you get pulled over, Wesley?”
“I tell them I’m porno, man. It’s just that simple, Billy. Shit man, I tell them I’m porno and then I hand them one of my DVDs.”
“You keep DVD’s your the car?”
“Fuck ya, man. I have them right on the passenger side seat. I hand them one of my DVD’s with me on the cover and show ’em it’s me and they let me go.”
“This works?
“Every motherfuckin’ time my man.”
So…I tell the cop I live in Arizona and I work in Los Angeles cause it’s legal to do what I do here, and it’s not legal in Arizona.
The cop asked, “What exactly do you do? And why did that woman pull over behind you?” He looked back and eyed Proxy and looked back at me.
“I make dirty movies for a living. She’s a porn star and we’re on our way to shoot some smut.”
The cop smiled. He looked back at Proxy.
Proxy waved and smiled at him.
The cop looked at me. “What company do you work for?” he asked.
“Well, you really wouldn’t know the name of my company, cause I made it sound normal. Totally non-porno. But you might know the name of some of the websites.”
The cop looked at me. “Name some of them, please.”
“Well, Blacks on Blondes is about the biggest one out there. I also shoot for The Dick Suckers, Manojob, and Mr. POV.” I added mine just for the shameless plug.
“Where’s your studio?”
This made me kinda nervous, but, using my best poker face, I told him.
Silence.
The cop looked back at Proxy — who smiled and waved once more — and then at my license. He looked back up at me, handed it back, and told me to have a great day. He didn’t want to see my registration — or my insurance. And even though I’ve never been in trouble in my life, I’ve never had a cop tell me have a great day.
Next time I’m going to carry a few of my DVD’s, right on the passenger side seat…just in case.
Nice work Mr. Watson. The guy has probably watched a few of your vids in his day and decided to return the favor that you’ve done him.
ha…funny!….didnt think you’d dislike that eat shit scene in Salo` 🙂 …..I found it hillariously funny!….as an italian I was able to watch it in original, and the translations arent very good……I think the most disturbing part was at the end when they were killing everybody….like that one girl getting scalped alive. All in all the movie is good….but weird and bizzare at the same time……too bad the director got killed shortly before the movie was released….cause otherwise he would’ve done other masterpieces as well.
LOL good one B
Good ole’ Wesley Pipes saving your ass! You owe him a beer…or a joint. Maybe Rodney King should have done some porn.
hi billy, and that was great,maybe he like all of us watch and enjoy your job.
about wesley pipes i find a guy in you tube, his name is benjamin he has put like 4 vidios of weasley in a interwiethat they have long time ago, i dont know, if you knom by now, anyway the thing is that he said really good thing a bout wesley,you should check in case you didnt know, and i think you know this guy,you has been in the bissnes for a while ,watch the video and you will see.
WESLEY is mi nigga, is so fucking funny and hilarius, yes sometimes he cross the line with his chat, but for me is funny.
you know that the real gansta in the game is wesley is like you said dangerous,nobody white or black porn actor want to mess wih him ,so why dont put in the screen your friend sasha grey with him, its gonna be awesome, a really a good duel between them,both are vocal and mean, lets see who win (of course us).
i know you only shoot porn,but after all this years i dont think you dont have influence in those website, or at least good conections in the porn bussines so makes this happen.
yes a long comment so i finish here .
take care bill, keep the good work.