We lost the car. Or, I lost the car. We had walked all the way back from the beach, up and down 2nd street in Santa Monica, and we couldn’t find the parking structure where our car was parked, mainly because all the parking structures looked the fucking same. We walked and walked and walked and walked, and no car, and all the while J. Sinn kept complaining, “My dick is really, really hard!”

I wonder if that’s cause Jacky Joy was riding around on his back, rubbing her pussy all over him. She was tired of walking, so she hopped on J., and I’m sure this was causing his woody. Either that or the fact that, for the last hour or so, we had just watched Jacky and Jayma wrestle around in the surf, making out the whole time.

And the more J. Sinn kept complaining about his stiff weiner, the more Jayma giggled. The more they both giggled. But I think I’ve mentioned this already.

For awhile, I really thought the car was stolen, but we finally found it. Which is where things got interesting. Actually, things got interesting on the 405, just a bit south of Sunset. That’s about the time she decided to take J Sinn up on his offer to make her squirt. She thought she wasn’t able to squirt; J. Sinn told her otherwise.

But I should back up.

J. Sinn learned how to make girls squirt from Dr. Phil Good, who learned how to make girls squirt from the master of making girls squirt – Axel Braun.

Axel Braun. He’s a funny guy. I read one of his dirty screenplays, once. It made me laugh. Why in the world would anyone write a screenplay for a dirty movie? I wonder if he story boards his dirty movies, too. Funny.

Anway, J. Sinn kept asking, over and over, if Jayma would allow him to make her squirt. And she was into it, and I was into watching it, so the next thing you know, Jayma’s jumping in the back, and Jacky’s jumping up front with me, and instantly Jayma’s shorts and panties are around her knees, and Jacky’s up front, and taken control of the radio, and my beloved Indie 103 is off, and something godawful is on, and it’s sure as shit definately on in the back seat, cause J. Sinn’s arm is moving a mile a minute, which is almost as fast as I’m driving down the 405, and in between lane changes and dodging other cars, I’m doing the best I can to enjoy the show.

And what a show!

Jayma’s head was buried somewhere under J. Sinn, and I think he was trying to fuck her, too; but she’s totally into teasing guys, and that’s exactly what she did. J would go back and forth – between trying to fuck her and make her squirt with his fingers; and I was going back and forth – between watching out for exit ramps and other cars; and Jack Joy was going back and forth – between one shitty radio station after another.

In the end, Jayma squirted. Everywhere. I’m glad the car was a rental, cause the back seat looked like someone dumped over a 5 gallon jug of water.

We piled out of the car, and I walked my date up to her room, and kissed her goodnight, and we made plans for the following day.

All in all, it was a good first date.

She called me the next day, after the Brandon Iron fiasco. I won’t go into our conversation here, cause sometimes things need to be personal, even on an internet porno blog…but she was scheduled for a shoot in a few hours, at Nicky Milo’s studio right down the hall. She was shooting a lesbo thing with Jacky Joy, her porno pal, and we agreed to go out afterward; I’d take them both out to dinner.

Nicky did his thing, and I did my thing, and at the end of the day, we were together and heading out to Santa Monica. That’s about the time J. Sinn showed up. J. Sinn is male talent, and he also works at Shane’s World as a production manager. He’s kinda out of a place to stay right now, so he crashes at the studio, in our Green Room. J’s a cool cat, and to top it off, his big sister is Bella Donna.

I love Bella Donna.

It’s funny, cause back at Dogfart’s secret mansion on the top of the hill, Bella seemed to be around a lot. She’s the one who introduced me to Boo D. Licious. She’s the one who introduced me to Nacho Vidal. I watched Bella piss all over Austin O’Reilly, once. Or maybe Austin pee-pee’d all over Bella. She’s also the one who shot the most extreme anal scene I’ve ever witnessed…so extreme, it was never shown publically. She’s the one Diane Sawyer fucked with on 20/20, and Bella held her own.

That’s cause Bella’s bad to the bone.

J. Sinn. Bella Donna’s baby bro. In the porno business. We had booked him for an Eat Some Ass scene, and now he’s in tow, bringing up the rear of our porno gang – and he’s Jacky Joy’s “date”.

No one’s been to Santa Monica – except me – so we’re off, and on the way, somewhere near the 405 and the 10, J. Sinn and my gal discover they’re both Mormons. I could blog and blog and blog about that kooky group of Christians who call themselves The Church of Latter Day Saints, but I’ll save that for later.

And at the dinner table, those two hit it off like champs. A real bond. The Mormon brethren were at it, recollecting their days in Utah, and having a blast. I was too, really, cause she was running her finger up and down my leg under the table, and we held hands walking down the Promenade, and listening to two Porno Mormons comparing notes over dinner is a very interesting conversation – trust me.

Did I mention the whole time Jacky Joy sent text messages to God-knows-Who? I bet that Dirty Pirate Hooker sent 200 messages by the time I paid the bill.

Afterward, the four of us walked the Santa Monica pier; we were hand-in-hand, me and her, and that’s all I really remember. We walked in the sand, too, and the girls ran in the surf, and Jacky lost her phone, and me and J Sinn talked shop, and all-in-all the night was a very good thing.

Here’s the weird part, and I might as well get it over with now: I’ve got this weirdo thing going on with my sexuality right now; specifically, I think it would be kinda hot to have a slutty girlfriend who did naughty things with guys and girls while I watched. Oh sure, it’s normal to wanna watch your gal – or your wife – lez off with another chick…but bringing a dood into the game is weird, and I’ll be the first to admit it. Five years ago, I woulda knocked a dood out if he made a pass at my chick; now, I find it kinda hot.

There’s something wrong with me.

OK – now that I got that off my chest, I might as well talk about losing the car, and looking all over for it, and that’s when J Sinn was flirting heavily with both girls, and he kept saying, over and over, his dick was hard…which made the girls giggle. And Jacky wasn’t paying much attention to him, but I knew my date was, and things were about to get really crazy.

There’s something very wrong with me.