(Not the Real) Ron Jeremy writes:

Hi Billy,

Ron

Ron!

What a nice way to return to blogging…that is, if I return to it on any sort of regular basis. See, truth is I’m kinda tired of blogging, and, honestly, I’m not sure I have much more to say. I mean how much more can I say about what I do for a living? I could sum it all up as follows:

The bitches are manipulative and opportunistic sluts.

There’s lots of scummy agents.

There’s money in it.

The dudes are, in fact, mostly crazy, and mostly negroes.

There’s lots of sex in it.

The End.

See? Just summing it up like that makes me wonder how I ever managed to bang out 371 of these.

Now, on to your e-mail. Very funny, funny man. I laughed hard. Dude — let’s get a few things straight: I’m closer to 30 pounds overweight than 50; I love my Birkenstocks; nothing tastes yummier after a kushy bowl of OG Kush than anything with a whole lotta high fructose corn syrup in it; and finally, the songs on my iPod are way better than yours.

I almost feel like taking you up in your challenge, Mister Jeremy. Five years ago, when I was teaching, I was also running and watching what I shoved in my pie-hole…and damn, the byatches I taught at that little community college thought I was the best thing since Tom Cruise.

Or Justin Timberlake.

Or George Clooney.

Or Richard Gere.

You get it.

So yea, maybe it’s time to start getting some of that fine lovin’ once again. Shit, maybe if I get really into shape, and can run for miles and miles, maybe Miss Wolfe will like me.

Or LC.

Or Barbie Cummings.

Or anyone of the handful of the super foxy ladies who call me Mister Billy Watson.

Oh, and by the way, the fatso in the portrait is Daniel Lambert, one of England’s most obese men ever in the whole history of England, which, as we all well know, is a country with quite a history. He didn’t live too long, and he clocked in at over a Nickel.

Which is 500 pounds.

And that’s a whole lot of man to love.

I bet Barbie Cummings would have loved him — at least for a little while.

J. writes:

hi bill im a big fan of your manojob site particularly as its one of the only handjob sites out there to use black man. I just had an idea for a scene, could you do one where the man is tied up or restrained. for example we could have a scene with the woman dressed as a sexy policewoman (short skirts,low cut top) and the brotha is handcuffed so is restrained as he gets a handjob. Or you could have one with him tied to a cheer like he is being interrogated and his punishment is getting a handjob, I think that would be really sexy, having him tied or handcuffed to a chair or wall so he cant move while he is getting his dick whacked off is so fucking sexy and you know deep down inside everyone fantasises about getting there dick whacked off without there consent. peace

Hey J!

Interesting you bring this up.

When I started developing Manojob, I imagined a pretty simple, straight-forward, gonzo style site. It seemed, at that time, that all the dirty sites out there featured camera men who thought they were super funny…so funny they’d add commentary to whatever it was they were shooting. And they musta thought they were SO funny, or had such insight, that their commentary was more important than the scene they were shooting.

So when I starting filming Manojob, my only rule was NO DUDE TALK. Not once, on that site, would you ever hear a guy’s voice. No silly banter. No stupid jokes.

Oh, and the girl has to finish the guy. No jacking on dude’s part whatsoever.

I’ve learned now there’s a whole fetish thing happening with handjobs that’s submissive in nature. Just like the scenarios you outlined.

I was surfing around Clips 4 Sale, where I have a small clip store. And almost all of the handjob scenes feature restrained dudes getting jerked by dominant women…some scenes are really kooky, too. Like “orgasm denial” where the girl won’t allow the dude to cum…with dudes tied up and shit.

Kooky. With a K.

Which isn’t a bad thing at all.

I just don’t wanna turn Manojob into a BDSM thang, you know? But who knows…I just might have a few girls tie some poor sap off, and then jerk him silly.

Just for you.

Cause it’s all about the customer, right?

Your pal, Billy

PS: Check out Taylor Kurtis! I shot her a couple years ago for Spunkmouth, and we just recently got to work together again! Ain’t she grand? I shot the scene at a cheap hotel in Vegas, January of 05, during AVN’s. Here’s some free Taylor Kurtis movies from that scene just for you, my friend. And remember this…there’s not a whole lot of Taylor doing naughty things with a boy out there!

Now Peace out with your bad self.

DN The Hater writes:

I just thought of something that made me laungh but also makes me curious. I cannot watch porn while eating food…am I alone in this or does everyone feel this way?

DN! The Hater!

We finally agree on something!

I, too, cannot watch porn while I eat. Wait! Lemme back up! I don’t watch porn anymore! Really, I don’t. I know I say this a lot, but people don’t believe me! Seriously…if you’re feeling like porno’s taken over your life, here’s a few things you can do:

1) Start making porn. It’ll cure your “addiction” for sure.

2) Eat a whole bunch, cause I think DN’s onto something here. You’ll end up really fat, but at least you’ll be cured of your porno “addiction”.

It’s funny, cause when I eat, I really like to watch TV, and usually only the news. Isn’t that weird?

I can be listening to Howard Stern, but as soon as lunch is ready, Howard’s off, and CNN is on. I also can’t listen to music when I eat. I can watch a movie while I’m eating, but usually only when I eat snacks; if I’m eating dinner I usually default back to one of the major news networks (except FOX), and when I’m done it’s back to the movie…and perhaps a delightful snack.

Also, did you notice I placed the word “addiction” in quotes when I refer to it with porno? That’s cause there’s no such thing as porno “addiction”. Oh sure, you can be hung up on porn, but it’s not porn’s fault…just like it isn’t alcohol’s fault when you’re boozing too much.

Just like your gambling addiction isn’t a roulette wheel’s fault.

However, nicotine addiction kills 400,000 (or so) lives a year.

“Murder” might be a better word, since the tobacco corporations have known this for years and have spent billions trying to make it go away, all the while continuing to produce and sell it.

Why aren’t the Christians pissed off about this?

Oh! Where’s a good Porno Lobbyist in Washington DC when you need one?!

Anyway, on a completely different note, this week’s Gloryhole girl is Nicky Hilton! And please don’t get her confused with that other Hilton girl Kelly!

Just make sure you’re all done with that yummy burger and fries before you pull down your pants, surf over to Gloryhole, and rub one out to Nicky Hilton blowing a black dick about the size of her arm.

Isn’t she a cute little thing? And what’s a girl like that doing in a place like that??

Of course DN won’t be going anywhere near the site since we all know he hates Gloryhole.com more than just about anything else in the whole wide world. But that doesn’t mean I don’t like him!

As always,

Your Pal Billy

Trixa The Honky Cuckold writes:

whats up billy its the honky trixta again, long time since i wrote and found out to my disappointment that you would not help me on my quest to be the newest and most frail weenied cuckhold of them all. i just finished watching some spring thomas and i jacked off twice. Two big loads(for a white guy) so i know im not just talkin with my dick while im writing all this. i really feal im a genuine white guy who appreciates a good white chick that fucks the brothas, black cock whores that please black dudes hand and foot. i jerk off when i come home from the office because i have to have some kinda release from being hard all day watching hot white bitches flirting with all the buff brothas. There not even in high positions, shit some of them are in the mailroom, yet smokin hot white chicks are sizing them up ovulating and strategically positioning themselves for that black baby batter in their pussies. I figure if you cant beet em join em. I dont just wanna sit back while this whole takeover of Negroes is producing fatherless mulatto children , i wanna be a part of the action. Thats why i would be very excited to do my part by acting out the wimpy honky who gets robbed abused (both by the negros and the white girls who submit to them) and then showing my level on the food chain,by eating her box and asshole out after the negros have had their fill. Now as a person like yourself who could appreciate this threw the lens and live entertainment is it to much to ask that you help me make this possible. It will be like apollo creed giving rocky an unknown nobody underdog a chance to fight in the ring. Pass this letter on to spring and all the brothas and see what they have to say, they just might wanna give this little non girthy inky winky pencil dick honky a chance. thank you

Trixa?

I’m sorry. I don’t think I’ve ever heard from you. Perhaps your e-mail ended up in my bulk e-mails, and I trashed it? Anyway, I’m not a huge fan of cuckoldry; I just give the fans what they ask for. I remember shooting my first Spring Thomas Cuckold Movie. It was really fun and really weird at the same time. Since then, I’ve done it a bunch. In fact, members like it so much we’re starting a whole site around a girl and her cuckold lovers. Think you’re going to like it, my friend. Too bad I can’t tell you more.

I get a lot of e-mails from hapless white boy cuckolds like yourself, and while I try to include them in my movies, I’m always a bit hesitant…for a few reasons. You’re probably a complete creep and someone I really don’t want to be around; in addition, you probably live far away from my studio and can’t get here; finally, you were probably drunk when you wrote this, and since you’ve nutted from the thought of someone reading your fantasy, your head is clear now, and you really don’t want to subject yourself to actually carrying out your cuckoldry on camera, for the whole world to watch.

And remember, Trixa, most fantasies are best at being just that — a fantasy.

Your pal, Billy

e writes:

After a long valentine’s day session with the wife, I found myself a bit chafed. As a faithful reader of your blog, I began to wonder how those porno dudes manage to fuck hour on hour, day after day, without any apparent damage. Since you are the one person I know of with a line on the private lives of porn actors, I thought I would ask you: what do porno dudes do to keep their cocks in shape for work? Is there a certain moisturizer? Do they always always use a specific kind of lube? Do they just have naturally tough dicks? Are they just so damned psyched to be nailing Lorilei Lee, Jacky Joy, Bree Olson, Adrianna Nicole, Gia Paloma, Mackenzie Wilson, Nicole Scarlett, et al, that they just suffer through the pain and skin loss? Or is there a BIG SECRET?

Heya e:

No big secret, really. A penis is a fairly rough and tough tool, and I know you’ll pardon the pun. Just a few helpful things to remember:

1) Don’t forget to use the lube! And don’t be a cheapskate here. Get to your favorite adult shop and throw down some extra coin for Eros. It’s packaged in a black tube, and the shit rocks.

2) Porno dudes do wear out, and some do so frequently. You just never get to see it, but know it does happen.

3) And yea, it helps to be nailing super hot porno whores, too.

Short, sweet, and to the point. Oh, I’m gonna leave out obvious things like exercise and a living a healthy lifestyle, and the not-so-obvious, like “V”, Cialis, Caverjack, and all that.

Your pal – B

John writes:

I’ve often wonder if the myth of the porn starlet as an insatiable nymphomaniac who enters adult industry as a means of satisfaction is nothing more than a myth. Obviously, none of these girls would be doing what they do if it wasn’t for the pay but, I can’t help thinking (or maybe that’s hoping) that some of these girls really are insatiable nymphos. I would understand given what they do for a profession if sex is the furthest thing from these girls’ minds when the cameras off. However, I’ve heard stories of some these starlets blowing random strangers and being up for sex at a moment’s notice and of course when the camera’s on a starlet will always tell you how much she can’t get enough of sex. So I guess my question is have you actually encountered any of these girls? Do they really exist? Or are they just a myth?

John

Hey John!

Funny you should e-mail me this, cause almost to the day I got your e-mail, Jacky Joy called me up to say howdy and all that, and then she went on to tell me what a “nymph” she’s been lately. Her words, not mine. The conversation went something like this:

“Oh Billy, I’ve been such a little nymph lately. I’m fucking everyone I work with – girls and boys – as well as this cute boy who’s about to go to Iraq, and blah blah blah I’m such a nymph blah blah I’m horny all the time blah blah I’ve been so naughty blah blah blah but I LOVE it! blah blah blah…”

(Jacky Joy just visited my studio! Look at the BTS pics! I know how much the fans love BTS! We made another handjob movie! In fact, Jacky’s one of my favorite nymphs of all time…the other being Maggie, my Golden Retriever.)

I know it’s hard to imagine there are women who have the same kind of sex drive as a man, but some do. So, John, the “myth”, so to speak, is somewhat a reality.

But that’s not really what makes a girl get into porn, you know?

In fact, if I were to make a list of the top 5 reasons a girl gets into making dirty movies, here’s what it would look like:

5) They got a whole bunch of hard core fundamentalist religion crammed down their throat during their formative years, and, to top it off, a whole bunch of insanely strict rules to go along with their insane theology.

4) They got almost no attention whatsoever from their fucked-up parents.

3) Taking it even one step further, either mom or dad were completely null & void in their life — usually Dad.

2) They are promiscuous. (Which is a direct result from the lack of attention they received growing up, some sort of sexual abuse they received while growing up, or they really are horny all the time, which means they absolutely love sex, and, hence, are insatiable nymphs. Feel free to combo any and all in #2 — or let any single reason stand by itself).

1) Porn money is Easy Money! (But not so easy…but that’s another blog itself).

Remember, John, this is by no means a complete list, and you can combine any of the above to create your favorite porno gal. I also didn’t mention things like the girls who party too much, the girls who were adopted (which may or may not relate to numbers 4 and 5, the girls who are really lazy and love the idea of laying on their back for 2 hours a day as “work”, as well as the people in this world that simply cannot do a typical 9 to 5 thing behind a desk and have discovered sex as a business.

I’ve encountered them all…which is to say none of it is really a “myth”, is it?

In addition, I’m not making any sort of claims about Jacky Joy specifically…like I said earlier, she just called the same time I got your e-mail, and I took some fun pics of her behind the scenes, and I thought you’d like to see them.

Did I just ruin it all for you?

Cause if I did, I’m sorry.

Ignorance is bliss, eh?

Your pal — Billy

BLY writes:

I have been interested in doing porn for a really long time. I understand u arent looking for male actors at the moment but for future refrence i am 28 yrs old, male , white, live in South Carolina. I have about an 8 inch penis and i have 3 piercings in the head of my penis. I can honestly say i have never seen a porn star with pierced genitelia. I would very much like to hear a response. Thank you for your time, i have enclosed a picture of my penis.

BLY

Heya BLY –

I went ahead and blogged this without your permission, but hey…I’ve done worse things in my life. So here’s my response, and it’s very much what I tell all the dudes who ask me how they’re gonna get their dick in the door and make dirty movies: get your ass to Los Angeles, be comfortable fucking in front of strangers in really uncomfortable places with hot lights all over you and a director screaming at you to do impossible things with your 8 inch pee pee while trying your hardest not to bust too fast, or not at all, all over a girl you may like or may hate — or all over a girl that may like, or hate, you.

And there’s a reason why you haven’t seen a straight male pornstar with a dick full of earrings: lose them. At least when you show up on the first day of your new job.

Do a search on my blog and find the phone number for the boys over at American Bukkakke…lately those dudes are shooting right down the hall from me, and it’s a terrific place to jump start your career as a porn star…and you’ll make 75 bucks to boot! Imagine that! Getting paid 75 clams to bust your balls all over a Cute Lil’ Hussy…you’ll think you died, and went to straight to Heaven.

If you don’t fail, knock on my door and introduce yourself after you get paid — just please be as normal as you possibly can, OK?

Your pal – Billy

The Honkey writes:

whats up, all of you at west coast, Im a big fan of your interracial porn. You guys are doing a great job of getting hot white girls to submitt to black dudes, and its crossed over big time in all the cities and suberbs. I know a lot of Italian and russian girls that are giving it up to the brothas on the down low and on the up an up. I talk to this hot italian chic, were cool, and she tells me shes been on craigs list looking for a black guy to pop off in her ass and mouth. She the brunette to the far right. She said if I can help her find a brotha shell let me watch her get fucked or jerk me off with her feet. Man im askin you to hook up this honkey and sighn her up, ill take the left overs after she gets spunked in the ass and mouth. i will take What ever she will give me on camera or off, ive been cool with her for 8 years now and you cant touch her unless you have money or you black dude packin a pistol. even if she doesn’t want to go threw with it on film, hook me up with a jerk off spot in one of your flicks i love to see white girls get pounded by the more dominent male species. ill sit there in the corner and jerk my little pencil dick off while one of the brothas is diggin into a piece of hot white meat. I live in NYC, ill fly over to the west coast for that assighnment and you dont have to pay me. ill do it for free. write back and let me know whats up.

Dear Honkey –

Here’s what’s up: your e-mail may surprise some, but, oddly (or strangely…or sadly) enough it doesn’t surprise me. See, I get to read a lot of the fan mail that comes to Blacks on Blondes, and Spring Thomas, and Gloryhole, and some of the other interracial porn sites I shoot for, and, well…a TON of them are almost exactly like yours.

Sometimes it’s the wife, or the girlfriend, but like I said, there’s a whole lotta Honkeys like you trying to get their gal sick with some o’ dat Jungle Fevah, yo.

My reaction is three fold:

1) You’re drunk, or high, or drunk and high, and it’s 3 am, and you’re horny, and you haven’t busted a nut yet, and you’re looking at a pic of a girl you may or may not know, and you’re in fantasy mode, and part of that fantasy is actually writing the e-mail to me, or Blacks on Blondes, which, once you hit the “SEND” button on your e-mail software, should do the trick…now go clean up.

2) You’re drunk, or high, or drunk and high, and it’s 3 am, and you’re horny, and you’re pissed that your chick just broke up with you recently, and she’s actually the pretty brunette you’re speaking of, and this is part of your revenge fantasy, which, once you hit the “SEND” button on your e-mail software, should do the trick…now go clean up.

3) You’re drunk, or high, or drunk and high, and it’s 3 am, and you’re horny, and you’re about to ask your girlfriend to live out a fantasy of yours, which is to bang a black dude while you watch, so you’re fishing a bit and thinking an e-mail to me might actually work, which, once you hit the “SEND” button on your e-mail software, should do the trick…now go clean up.

I’m betting Number 1 is the truth here, mainly cause any chick in the world – even super duper ugly ones – can get laid without resorting to Craigslist.

Number 2 might be it, but I don’t think so.

And if I hit the jackpot with Number 3, my advice to you is don’t: some fantasies are left being just that. Make her talk like a dirty truck driver to you while you guys do it, make say she’s worships black dick (any dialogue along those lines will work splendidly) but don’t go through with it my brotha…cause every single person I know that’s gone there wishes, eventually, that they didn’t go there – for lots of different reasons, none of which being the girl turned into a black cock whore and never wanted to be with Honkies like us again.

In addition to your cuckold fantasy, you’re a foot fetish dude, too; from my days shooting porno and reading porno related e-mails all I can tell you is there’s a whole lotta cuckolds and foot worshippers.

I’d stick to having girls jerk you with their sweet little toesies, my friend.

Yours – Billy

D writes:

Mr. Watson,
In your latest posting you touched straight vs gay porn and the men in both. For many years I’ve been a member of a twelve step group, AA, and although my problem was strictly a case of to many empties lying around after an evening of social drinking, the doors of the group were open to anyone regardless of other issues. It was also strongly Christian, so we are talking some conflicted souls. It was in North Hollywood, so it drew from the same demographic group as your performers.

D

Dear Mister D –

Yes, the act of disassociation is very, very powerful, and to tell you the truth, I’ve been on sets, shooting, and noticed the female talent disassociating herself from what was taking place on camera. And I gotta tell ya, brotha, I’m fortunate as it’s only happened to me once or twice – and with the same girl (whose name won’t be mentioned here)…cause it really bummed me out.

Anyone who enters into Man-on-Man Luvin’ is, at the very least, bisexual. I don’t care what kind of disassociation skills Bi Boi has worked out for himself – or how much time he’s doing in the clink. I had one male performer who’s Gay-for-Pay tell he he’s “80% straight” – and it’s still a total mystery to me how he pulled that number out of his hat, and what it means exactly: I’m assuming that out of the last 10 people he’s banged, 8 were girls.

Another mystery to me is that tat-on-the-lower-back phenom that’s seems to ever so popular among girls today — the “Tramp Stamp”. One of my favorite parts of “The Wedding Crashers” is when it was referred to as a “target”, which, to me, is as good as any explanation I can come up with; that, or it’s a safe place to have something “naughty” hidden…it’s a place that covers easily when need be.

Any time a dude masturbates for others to see, there’s some sort of sexual deviance taking place. Wait, I take that back. I’m going to state, right here and now, that gay sex isn’t deviant sexual behavior, even though it’s defined as being so. And sure, the straight boys I film beating their meat is intended for the gay market…cause, simply put, you can’t rely on female consumers in my business; as a whole, and for practicality’s sake, girls buying porn simply doesn’t exist.

The other masturbation forum that is definitely deviant behavior is beating off in public as a means of shocking / disturbing / flashing an unknowing victim…and, of course, this is always a dude being super creepy in public. My whole point here, of course, is that sort of behavior isn’t “gay” — it’s just criminal.

If the T-Girl who blew you never told you She was a He, then that’s criminal, too…and you’re not gay. If you knew a T-Girl was blowing you, then you’re at least 20% gay.

And finally, I’d like to make a statement on this whole HIV/AIDS-In-Porn thing that so many people seem interested in: while never downplaying or minimalizing the risks associated to sex-without-a-condom, and certainly not trying to pass myself off as a health care professional, I believe it’s super very tough to transmit HIV through oral and vaginal sex. I won’t shoot an anal creampie, however…which is to say even I have limits to the debauchery I record to digital video tape.

Thanks for your kind words, D.

Your pal, Billy