M writes:

Hi Billy Watson,

Thanks — M

————

M!

Gloryholes are everywhere! If you don’t believe me, just be aware.

Gloryholes are in public places. Usually seedy, dirty public places. But sometimes they’re drilled in places that you’d never expect: I think I told you about the time I was studying during my undergrad years and I had to make a Number Two at the library?

I hate making Number Two’s in public places; in fact, unless it’s “Code Red”, and I’m about to shit my pants, I’ll hold that dump until I manage to get home to drop The Deuce.

Which is to say I’m a home field player when it’s Doody Time.

Anyways, I was studying, and suddenly — out of nowhere — Code Red hit, and I was forced into the University’s bathroom to leave the Browns at the pool. As usual, I carefully inspected each and every toilet seat, and, as usual, almost each and every toilet seat looked more like a science experiment in dirty filth than a place you’d want to sit…but I found the cleanest one, pulled about three pounds of toilet paper off the roll to clean the seat, and once it was as clean as I could make it, I sat down, ready to make my Chocolate Soft Serve.

That’s when I looked to my right, and directly next to the toilet paper dispenser was a hole drilled into the stall divider.

Come on — I’ve told this story too many times. The point is “G-Holes” are everywhere! Common spots include adult book stores (check the peep booths and premium “private viewing rooms”) as well as truck stop bathrooms, library bathrooms, and airport restrooms.

I just caught myself sounding mighty gay, huh? I mean most G-Holes are a Gay Thang, but No Way Am I Gay.

Your pal — Billy