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Free Smut Courtesy of The Dick Suckers.com

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Anna Von Trapp

1) Here’s free Anna Von Trapp pictures. She was an amateur one-timer who needed some fast cash to get out of a jam. We were glad to help her out.

2) Here’s some free Eva Angelina blowjob movies. Great flicks, especially since they’re from her pre-fake boobie era.

3) Here’s some free Keesha Knight blowjob pictures. She was an amateur one-timer who needed some fast cash to get out of a jam. We were glad to help her out.

4) Here’s some free Jayma Reed blowjob movies. Jayma’s now calling herself Kymber Troy. Back when I shot these movies, she was my extra-special friend. Now, she’s just my very good friend. Trust me, there’s a big difference.

5) Here’s some free Carmen Kinsley blowjob pictures. Carmen’s a super-heet. That means she’s very hot. And since she doesn’t live in Porn Valley, there’s not a lot of smut out there featuring her.

6) Here’s some free blowjob movies featuring Kimmy. Kimmy is an amateur girl who can’t manage her money properly, so about every other month I’ll get a call from her asking for a job. This is one of the job I gave her.

7) Jayma Reed and Julia Bond free blowjob movies. Johnny Fender was the lucky guy. 2 Girls, 1 Guy…which is a lot different than 2 Girls, 1 Cup.

8) Here’s some free Jenni Lee blowjob movies. Jenni’s a mainstream model who’s crossed over to The Dark Side. Which is to say she makes dirty movies from time to time, depending on her financial status. This sums up 98% of all Porn Whores.

9) Here’s some free Kissy Kapri blowjob movies. After clicking on this photo set, you may be asking yourself why is she fucking on a BJ site? Well, that was a “friend” she brought to set, and he wanted to be in porno movies, and this was his audition. So they fucked in order to impress me. It worked.

10) Here’s some free Kinzy Jo blowjob movies. We call this a “blow bang” in the porno biz. It’s akin to a gang bang, but the only hole that gets plowed is the girl’s pie-hole. This often results in jizz bubbles emitting from said pie hole.

Kinzy Jo

Here's the Skinny on Your Favorite Star, random raves, stories from porno land (some amusing, some not)

Bree Olson — My Personal, Part-time Cleaning Lady

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Bree Olson

When Bree Olson is a little short on pocket change, I have her swing by my place, and I put her to work. This time, for $10 an hour, I had her to a little kitchen clean up…you know, the dishes, counter tops, clean out my fridge. Often, while she’s doing the odd, little chores I have for her, she winds up nude.

All this is, of course, a big fat lie. Since signing her contract to Adam & Eve — and winning the AVN for Best New Starlet — Bree Olson doesn’t need any pocket change. In fact, I bet her pockets are much fatter than mine.

Bree’s awesome. One of the best in the biz. If she wants it, she could end up one of the best ever. I wish I could work with her again, but that’s OK. She’s a contract star, and she deserves it.

Did I mention the Bree Olson fan page?

Then what’s the point here? Well…I just scored a gig shooting for Donny’s Girls. I’m really excited about it, too, cause all the girls on Donny’s site are soft core girls. Well…most of them are soft core models only. Some do hardcore…like Bree. But the whole site is a softcore site, akin to Penthouse style poses.

But who’s Donny? And how did he score all these girls?

Donny is Donovan Phillips, and he recently found the Lord, so no more taking pictures of nekkid girls for Donny. That’s kinda how I scored the gig. I won’t go into how I feel about Donny’s decision; all I’ll say is I respect peoples’ convictions and faiths the best I can — including Donny’s decision to stop his evil ways and follow a more pure, righteous path.

There’s nothing wrong with taking dirty pictures and making dirty movies, and Hell’s the last place a person is going to end up for making smut or pleasing themselves to it.

No Way Jose.

Boy do I like this soft core gig! No more waiting on wood from the male talent; no more waiting on a pop shot from the male talent; no lube, baby wipes, or whining from the female talent cause there’s jizz in her eye and it burns.

And let’s face it — in the general scheme of things, the girls who don’t do hardcore are hotter than the girls who do it. Remember, that’s the general scheme of things. I’m not dissing the hardcore girls one bit, but let’s face it, the hotter you are, the less shit you gotta eat in this world.

Or, the less jizz you gotta eat.

Ain’t life grand?

Bree Olson

Here's the Skinny on Your Favorite Star, random rants, random raves

Unsung Starlets

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Gianna Michaels

The AVN Awards are over, and the only award categories I gave a shit about were “Unsung Starlet of the Year”.

I hate the term “porn star”; moreover, I hate girls who walk around referring to themselves as “porn stars”.

Boy: What do you do for a living?

Girl: I’m a porn star.

No you aren’t. You might fuck in front of a camera, and you might have been doing it for a while…but that doesn’t make you a porn star.

Porn Stars transcend the business. Which is to say if you asked the average person walking down the street, Hey, who is (fill in your favorite porn whore’s name here)? they’d recognize the name.

And I’m not talking about asking a Porno Fan who whacks it in front of TV — or the computer — all day long.

I’m talking about The Average Joe. If you walked up to Average Joe and asked, “Do you know who Jenna Jameson is?” of course they’d know, cause Jenna is a motherfucking Porn Star.

It’s that simple. And the list of the rest of them isn’t that long: Nina Hartley, Ron Jeremy, Traci Lords, and John Holmes immediately come to mind.

And that’s about it.

Stormy Daniels? I dunno. Kaite Morgan? Maybe…cause HBO’s in love with her. Even Stone? No way. Tera Patrick? I dunno. Ginger Lynn? Yea…maybe.

Anyways, this means that just about all the girls working the porn circuit right now could, in a way, be classified as an “Unsung Starlet”. And it’s all these unsung starlets that are responsible for coaxing those loads out of your ball sac. It’s the unsung starlets that go from set to set, director to director, almost every day…a lot of times not knowing what they’re about to get themselves into: shitty male talent; shitty director; shitty make talent and director.

The only criteria to be an unsung starlet, as far as I’m concerned, is one of time: you gotta be in porno for at least a year to be an unsung starlet. And never, ever call yourself a “Porn Star”.

That’s about it.

And the nominees for the 2008 AVN Unsung Starlet Award were:

Roxy DeVille: She totally deserved this award. Totally hot, great to work with, and hardly ever talked about. At least not that I see.

Gianna: Gianna won. She deserved it, too. Hands down. Gianna works her ass off, takes this biz very seriously, and is great to work with. Congrats Gianna!

Veronica Jett: She deserved this award. She’s great to work with, a pleasure to have on set, and she has has her own free site!

Katarina Kat: I have no idea who this silly whore is. Why call her silly? Why call her a whore? Why not! And of course I use the term “silly whore” as one of admiration and respect. Really…I do.

Faith Leon: Again, I’ve never heard nor seen nor shot Faith Leon. But then again, I quit watching porn about five years ago, which, not-to-coincidentally, is about the time I got into this biz.

Gianna Lynn: Who? Maybe this is another good qualifier for the “Unsung Starlet” nomination — if I’ve never heard of them, call them “unsung”.

Brooke Haven: She totally deserved this award. Brooke’s been cranking out super hot scenes for at least the last 3 years, which, if I’m not mistaken, was the last (and only) time I’ve worked with her. Maybe it was two years ago.

Lindsey Meadows: Uh huh. Unsung.


Trina Michaels: Trina’s another one who deserved the trophy. Wait. It’s a statue. Wait. It’s a glass thingy that doubles as a paper weight or a murder weapon. I dunno. What I do know is that last time I shot Trina was with Ruth Blackwell, and Trina took it in the cakes. Like a Champ. An Ass Champ.

Mikayla: I’m tired of one-named porno girls, except maybe Sophia, who’s been noticeably left off this nominee list.

Adrianna Nicole: OK, I might sound a bit biased here, but Adrianna should have won this award, cause she’s an excellent friend, and she has impeccable tastes when it comes to movies, dining out, and taking pics of her own poop. She also shoots a fucking hot scene, and she’ll do just about anything you ask of her…as long as the rate is right.


Amber Rayne: Another good candidate. Amber’s one of the best. Her ass gapes beautifully, and she likes hockey a whole lot. That should mean something to someone.

Mia Rose: Who are some of these girls? Unsung, I suppose…

Sammie Rhodes: As long as I’ve seen her around — and I did shoot Sammi once, and she was great — she shouldn’t even be mentioned here cause Sammie currently only does girl-girl, and let’s face it, solo / girl-girl on your dance card should mean you can’t work in this business anymore.

Bobbi Starr: Wow! What a packed race. Bobbi Starr is good. No, she’s great. I’ve dragged her to the gloryhole a few times, and she loves it. The only thing she loves more? Length n’ Girth. A total Size Queen. On a personal note, I think she plays the cello. Or the violin, or maybe it’s the viola. The oboe? Classical guitar? Certainly the Skin Flute, but like I said, only if it’s XXL or bigger…unless you’re paying her rate.

Finally, I’d like to mention that Sophia was totally overlooked here and should have replaced Mia Rose, or Mikayla, or Lindsay Meadows, or Gina Lynn, Faith Leone, or Katarina Kat. For over three years Sophia’s played the game, and she’s done a great job. I’ve seen her do more off-the-hook shit in dirty movies than anyone else I can think of…and yet, no one really pays much attention. Too bad, cause she’s one of the best.

Sophia

Barbie Cummings

I Shoot Porn Breaking News: BarbieCummings.com Finally Launched!

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Barbie Cummings

Barbie Cummings has a web site. You can join it. It’s amazing. Borders on disturbing…no, wait. It is disturbing. On so many levels.

Don’t believe me? Then check it: more free Barbie Cummings pictures.

All she wanted was a black baby. Which is to say every single scene ends in at least two dicks giving Barbie a creampie.

Who knows…perhaps she’s already impregnated by The Black Man?

I could write a book on Barbie Cummings. At least some great short stories. Who knows…maybe someday I will.

There’s certainly many more Barbie Cummings posts to come: Barbie’s desire to fuck and suck a dog; Barbie’s desire to name her future black child “Cool”; Barbie blowing a cop on the side of the road (and NOT to get out of the ticket like everyone falsely claims); Barbie almost twisting Jack Napier’s huge schlong off at Ruth Blackwell’s pad (he seriously got so pissed I thought he was gonna leave and never come back); her love of sushi; her marriage to a dude she met 8 days earlier at the airport; Fifi and Boozer.

I could go on and on…

And I will. Soon.

BarbieCummings.com has finally arrived.

Guest Bloggers, Here's the Skinny on Your Favorite Star

Today’s Guest Blogger — Doron Pepperscone: “Porn Folks Who Don’t Annoy Me”

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Super Minion

I’m here at the Manojob.com studio waiting for replacement talent for a porn chick who flaked on us. Who fucked us over? Let’s just say it was raining HER and dogs a few days ago. While I’m waiting for agents to call back it’s given me a few moments to look back on the very few individuals in the business who make my job easier and tolerable. The follow is in no particular order:

Gia Paloma – This super make-up artist is always there with a smile on her face and a work ethic that’s second to none. Her magic lies in that she takes porn chicks from a 3 to a 10 on the “hotness” scale once she’s done her make-up wonders on them. Gia is also what you’d call ” a cool chick”.

Adrianna Nicole – Adrianna dubbed me “Doron Pepperscone” some months ago and it’s stuck. When she’s not talking about bowel movements, farting in public, or dreaming of massaging my prostate she’s giving phenomenal scenes. Again, another “cool chick”

Audrey Elson – She packed up her car and made the trek to Porn Valley. She’s a pleasure to be around and is one tall drink of water.She’s all woman. She came on to me the other day and I said,”Whoa, I think of you as a sister. This is inappropriate!” Ok, that last part didn’t happen but she rounds up #3 on the “cool chick” list.

Harley Valley – I’m in love. Let’s move on

Johnny Fender– He’s someone I consider a good friend. He always manages to make me smile even when I want to punch a hole in the wall. He’s funny as fuck and his pop shots turn girls into walking glazed donuts.

FaceBlaster– When the late Chico Wang was shooting for Diabolic he had a series called “No Swallowing Allowed”. Wang put the call out for dudes to come and drain their DNA on a chick. Faceblaster stepped up to the plate and his loads are amazing. It’s been 4 years since I first met him. He’s also someone I can come to and he is the voice of reason since I can be irrational at times

Mike “Mr Personality” Hash- Good guy. Huge pops. He keeps to himself and doesn’t creep anyone out. If you ever encounter him remind him that he looked great as the Pied Piper.

Ricky D – Good Guy. His shooting skills are flawless and he’s going to make big waves in ’08

The Watson bros.- Both run a well oiled machine in manojob.com, chelci fox, thedicksuckers.com, and no way am i gay.com. They are the most level headed people I have ever worked for in this business. Tony and Billy are the dynamic duo and I’m fortunate to be part of their inner circle.

Here's the Skinny on Your Favorite Star, random raves

Aralyn Barra and The Gloryhole

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Aralyn Barra

Aralyn Barra is a slut for black men.

She’s a black cock whore. She’s BCS. Aralyn was a Spring Thomas fan before she broke into the porno biz, and one of the first dirty movies she wanted to make was with Spring…the both of them worshiping black dicks.

That hasn’t gone down yet, but one things for sure, when you see some of the free gloryhole movies featuring Miss Barra, you’ll know what I mean.

Total BCS.

When I booked Aralyn for our trip to the top secret gloryhole, I had no idea how much she’d be into sucking an anonymous dick. She told me things like it’s one of my secret fantasies, Billy, sucking off a total stranger who I don’t know and will never know! She also said things like, do you think a dick will even pop through the hole? and will we get in trouble if we’re caught?

It’s funny, but most of the girls I book for Gloryhole.com are really into making a fantasy turn into reality. Most are porn stars, but few have ever stepped into “The Hole”, and trust me, when I say they’re into it…they’re into it.

Aralyn asked me if a dick would pop through the hole, cause there’s times (a lot of times, actually), when there’s no one man enough to step into the hole to make it happen. Or, there’s no one in the booth next to us watching dirty movies. On days like that we wait around as long as we can, then get bummed out if we have to leave without getting our weekly update.

But that’s OK, cause it always seems that the next time we make a trip to The Hole, someone’s on the other side.

Someone Big and Black.

Time to digress: once I dragged an amateur girl and her cuckold hubby out to a hole, cause all hubby ever wanted to do was watch his gal blow a big black ween.

Time to get back to our story: we get to the Adult Book Shoppe (as in old school, medieval “shoppe”) and we’re in luck. About 5 minutes into watching the dirty flick they were playing on our $5.00 per half hour room, we’re heard a knock on the wall. Aralyn’s eyes lit up like it was Christmas morn’. Sure enough, there was a black guy on the other side, and Aralyn let out one of those shudders of excitement you only hear when a girl’s really turned out.

She dropped to her knees and serviced that black dick.

Then, something wonderful happened. Aralyn Barra looked up at me and said, “I want this dick in my ass!”

I was speechless. “Dr. Drew wouldn’t really like that sort of thing,” I said.

She stood up, turned around, and backed her ass right up to that wall. Maybe that’s why her scene is one of the favorites among the Gloryhole.com members.

I’m quite sure it has nothing to do with me.

When it was all said and done, I grabbed my trusty back pack, loaded up our concealed cameras, handed Aralyn a few baby wipes (no porn set is ever complete without them) and we walked out of the book shoppe.

Like we owned the place.

Cause really, for that half hour…we did.

Aralyn Barra

stories from porno land (some amusing, some not), Will I Get In Trouble For This?

Adrianna’s Shart Video

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Kelli Kallen

It started with a simple idea, focused on a marketing plan: make silly videos and upload them to You Tube, and then sit back and watch the sales come tumbling in.

We had Hannah West talk about her reluctance in performing interracial sex for the world to see; we had Ruby Knox talk about giving a hand job in the car on her road trip to LA; there was Harley Valley talking about something I don’t recall.

And then there was Adrianna Nicole’s shart experience.

Shart: the often surprising, often explosive combination of passing gas with fecal matter, resulting in embarrassment, laughter, and messy underpants.

It’s a simple equation: Shit + Fart = Shart.

Giggle now, Sharty Pants, and then just admit it’s happened to you at least once in your life. It’s happened to me a few times. I remember a Mighty Shart when I was in the 7th grade. Touch football. Ian and his twin brothers versus me and Kenny and someone else I can’t remember now. I do recall being on the verge of the flu, and I had to fart, so I let it rip and suddenly my undies were somewhat filled with diarrhea. It stunk, too. Bad. I was forced to run home, legs spread as a trotted as fast as I could. There was another time in college, at a party. I can’t even talk about that shart; the memories it conjures up are disturbing at best.

Once or twice I’ve had a very light shart, which resulted in nothing more than a skid mark in my underpants and some chuckles filling the room. That’s when I was living with a woman who loved to do laundry (serious), and she’ll tell you all about my Shart-Stained Undies.

Doron Pepperscone, my trusty side kick and Maker of Everything YouTube, got into Adrianna Nicole’s dressing room right before her second appearance at Manojob.com, and asked for a story. A simple story.

A Shart Story.

And Adrianna gave him one.

With story committed to tape, Pepperscone got to work in the editing bay, and whipped up a nifty You Tube video. Maybe you got to see it; maybe you didn’t. I’d love to show it to you now, but You Tube has suspended our account indefinitely.

Yep. All our videos were yanked. Which is kinda weird, cause none of them contained nudity, although there was plenty of vulgar language tossed around. But that doesn’t matter, cause buried deep in YouTube’s FAQ’s is one that states no promotion of pornographic websites.

I loved Adrianna’s Shart Video. Doron Pepperscone loved it. All 62,000 (give or take) viewers loved it too.

Except Adrianna.

Adrianna hated her Shart Video cause Pepperscone started it with a great picture of Adrianna’s supple, beautiful ass, and a farting sound with the words “CLEAN UP ON AISLE 4” in brown fonts. I found the whole thing wholly appropriate with an unsurpassed entertainment value. A real bargain, since it didn’t cost anything to look at, which, I’m sure, is the reason why You Tube is so popular.

I have no idea how to end this — complain about You Tube’s super gay rules and regulations, or make fun of Adrianna’s cry babying, or maybe a picture of the end result of a shart?

After an exhaustive Google image search for skidmarked undies, this is the best I could do:

Poop Cartoons