My Brain Is Toast. Dry. But With A Speck of Buttah.

Jacky Joy And Her Feet

My recent cry baby blog elicited more than a handful of e-mails, all of which were very nice. Everyone who wrote asked about my well-being; some told me to quit porn right away and do something else; some told me to take time off; some asked to take over my job.

Thanks guys.

Porn’s turned into a job for me, and it’s been that way for a while; still, it’s a job I’m not about to walk away from. I mean what would you rather do: teach 7th graders how to write paragraphs, or take pictures and movies of hot naked girls getting railed?

I still choose the latter.

Here’s another pic from the Jacky Joy jerk off session; it’s a close-up, and I’m still gnawing on her foot, and looking at the side of my over-sized skull makes me think of a Jeff Tweedy lyric:

One by one my hair is turning gray / One by one my dreams are fading fast away…

(IMPORTANT AFTERWARD: I’ve come to find out Woody Guthrie wrote the above lyric; Jeff Tweedy put it to music. Thanks for the heads-up bro!)

Jayno Oso and Her Second Trip To The Gloryhole

Jayna Oso Gloryhole

I booked Jayna Oso for a Blacks on Blondes scene and a trip to the Gloryhole.

Jayna’s been in the business for a while and has quite a name. I wouldn’t go as far as say she’s a “porn star”, but my criteria for porn star status is tough; there’s a lot of girls calling themselves stars, but until their name transcends the adult entertainment business, I’ll call them porno girls.

Porn Whores.

That sort of thing.

I dunno why I hadn’t booked Jayna, cause she’s hot, and I heard she gives a great scene. And when she showed up, I was kinda kicking myself for not booking her sooner.

But it turns out I had.

Or SS had.

Or Dogfart.

Someone did, cause a long time ago, when we were living in Dogfart’s secret mansion, Jayna Oso found her way up to the Mansion.

But she wasn’t calling herself Jayna Oso then. But I’ll get to that in a second.

When I was going over the scenes with Jayna, and I told her we were getting into the white van to head out to the newest gloryhole discovery at my favorite adult bookstore, Jayna said, “I’ve done a gloryhole before. For the Blacks on Blondes guys.”

I looked up at her. “That’s impossible. I’ve shot each and every one of these scenes, and I never booked you.”

Jayna kinda looked at me like she said something she shouldn’t have said. Turns out she might have. Cause, for a few months a long time ago, Jayna wasn’t Jayna…she was Malaysia.

And I did shoot Malaysia. In a Gloryhole. And I think SS or Dogfart shot her for Blacks On Blondes. I was running second camera back then, and I don’t remember her Blacks On Blondes scene…but I remember her Gloryhole.

“Well, I haven’t used that name for a long time. Not a lot of people know about it. I was Malaysia for a couple months, then I quit for a while, and then I came back as Jayna Oso.”

Now what do I do? I like to shoot as many different girls as I can. Which isn’t to say I don’t invite girls back to my sets, cause I do…a lot. So we took the trip to the gloryhole, and, afterward, Tone Capone came over and fucked Jayna Oso’s ass over a toilet in my studio.

I gotta say this – Jayna is way hotter than Malaysia ever was.

Jayna Oso Gloryhole

My Brain Is Toast. Dry. No Peanut Butter. No Jelly. Not Even A Speck of Buttah.

Jacky Joy Mano Job

And I have no idea why. I guess it’s the first time I’ve really experienced writer’s block, and honestly, I’ve been suffering through it for about a month now. I really feel like there’s not much more to tell you guys. I mean how many stories of porn whores, behind-the-scene antics, pop shots gone bad (or good), gloryhole madness, or big black dicks stuffed into little white chicks can you handle?

But there’s a pic of me working with Jacky Joy and Lucky Starr. Jacky’s agent took the picture.

And to tell you the truth, I’m kinda tired of it all: shooting porn, waiting for talent to show up at my place, the freaky-deaks I surround myself with; I’m tired of living in two cities, 6 hour commutes, and agents who try to get me to book ugly girls; I’m tired of black cock sluts, black cock whores, and almost anything else having to do with big, black dicks; I’m really tired of Gloryholes, Katie Thomas, pill poppers, waiting on male talent to pop, and the popping sound my brain is making right now.

My brain hurts right this very second, as I try to bang out another installment of a blog that’s now nearing 350 posts.

A friend of mine who works Pinkworld says just write anything, and make sure it updates, so you don’t lose your traffic. Did you notice the last batch of blogs from about a week ago? All the short ones that were, like…here’s so and so…she’s the newest update on (fill in the name of the website here)…it was a really good shoot…blah blah blah, bing bam boom.

Remember the last thing Johnny Rotten said before he left the stage in San Fransisco? The last time the Sex Pistols played with Sid? Of course you don’t, cause that was 1977, and you weren’t even born then, were you? I dunno…maybe it was 1978. I certainly wasn’t there, but I was born; and, in fact, was old enough to know who The Sex Pistols were, but I didn’t give a shit about them, cause I was very much into Van Halen’s first record that year.

(Did I ever tell you I was convinced Kiss’s Gene Simmons was, in fact, VH’s Michael Anthony — without make-up? Before you laugh too loudly, there’s proof in the pudding…just read the list of who VH thanks on the back of that record.)

Anyways…do you ever feel like you’ve been cheated?

I got an e-mail from some poor guy in the UK who joined (I assume) Spunkmouth and felt like I ripped him off. He took it very personally, and I felt bad. I even replied to his complaint, but I haven’t heard anything back.

I feel like I can’t blog anymore; I feel like I’m done. And now I’m cheating you again.

Go read Lorilei’s blog…or Barbie’s blog. They’re way more entertaining than this mess. In fact, Barbie’s dirty, slutty stories are totally real, and I wouldn’t read them if you’re at work…you might end up beating your meat under the desk, or something.

Spring Thomas called me the other day. We really don’t talk much, anymore. She said my blog has gotten her in trouble with her boyfriend. When I ask her to elaborate, she can’t, really. Which means she doesn’t want to. Which means it’s time to hang up the phone.

Here’s another pic of me, gnawing on Jacky Joy’s toes. I don’t have a foot fetish; I just thought it would make for an entertaining, behind-the-scenes snapshot.

Because, as of now, that’s about all I’ve got to show you.

Jacky Joy Mano Job

Super Fun E-Mails

lube

e writes:

After a long valentine’s day session with the wife, I found myself a bit chafed. As a faithful reader of your blog, I began to wonder how those porno dudes manage to fuck hour on hour, day after day, without any apparent damage. Since you are the one person I know of with a line on the private lives of porn actors, I thought I would ask you: what do porno dudes do to keep their cocks in shape for work? Is there a certain moisturizer? Do they always always use a specific kind of lube? Do they just have naturally tough dicks? Are they just so damned psyched to be nailing Lorilei Lee, Jacky Joy, Bree Olson, Adrianna Nicole, Gia Paloma, Mackenzie Wilson, Nicole Scarlett, et al, that they just suffer through the pain and skin loss? Or is there a BIG SECRET?

Heya e:

No big secret, really. A penis is a fairly rough and tough tool, and I know you’ll pardon the pun. Just a few helpful things to remember:

1) Don’t forget to use the lube! And don’t be a cheapskate here. Get to your favorite adult shop and throw down some extra coin for Eros. It’s packaged in a black tube, and the shit rocks.

2) Porno dudes do wear out, and some do so frequently. You just never get to see it, but know it does happen.

3) And yea, it helps to be nailing super hot porno whores, too.

Short, sweet, and to the point. Oh, I’m gonna leave out obvious things like exercise and a living a healthy lifestyle, and the not-so-obvious, like “V”, Cialis, Caverjack, and all that.

Your pal – B

Interview with a Porn Star (#24) – Satine Phoenix

Satine Phoenix'

I Shoot Porn: So, tell me how you got into this silly game we call Pornography.

Satine Phoenix: I started as a stripper at the Hustler Club in San Francisco. I kicked some habits, had to stop dancing, decided to start fetish modeling, and someone said, “Why don’t you try fetish bondage videos?” and I said why not? I got comfortable being naked in front of a camera. That was at Kink.com. From there I learned girl-girl was ok, and then penetration was ok, and then I moved to LA and started doing Vanilla Porn. I couldn’t help but have some sex with some boys while I was at it. Being a swinger helps!

ISP: So you know all the SF fetish girls I love so dearly: Lorilei Lee, Adrianna Nicole, and Bobbi Starr.

SP: I don’t know Bobbi, but I know Dana Di Armond. She taught me how to douche. Do you know Ariel X?

ISP: Nope.

SP: She’s one of my best girlfriends from SF. Our masochism matches. She’s fucking crazy and slutty like me.

ISP: What’s the sluttiest thing you’ve ever done?

SP: Well, in a nutshell, I like to organize orgies. That’s pretty slutty, right?

ISP: Yea, it is…but it’s kinda sterile. Sterile Sluttiness. You know what I mean?

SP: I got one for you. I haven’t told this to anyone in an interview…yet. When I was 17, there were these two boys. My friends. We were fooling around in one of their bedrooms. They had a video camera; I had an idea. I asked them to tie me to one of their workout benches. They put a mask on me, so no one could recognize me. They tied my arms above my head, and turned the camera on. This was all my idea, by the way. They started using objects on me. In me. In my pussy. I don’t remember exactly what they used on me, but the last one was a toothbrush. We didn’t have safe words. We didn’t know about them. So, I said, “OK, that’s enough!” Cause toothbrushes hurt. Especially electric toothbrushes. I got nervous, and I asked to finish. So I watched the video, and I told them to destroy it. They agreed. He was my best friend at that time. So I left, and then, a couple months later, I’m walking down the halls at school, and all of a sudden I hear, “HEY TOOTHBRUSH!”, and it hit me all like a ton of bricks. I was like NO FUCKING WAY. See, the problem was, I had a mask on…but I didn’t cover my tattoo that I gave myself when I was 15. It’s a tiny Ankh, and it’s so small. I asked the guys about it, and of course they lied and said they knew nothing about it…and then, graduation day. We’re at the back of the line. We wanted to walk in last, but so did The Jocks. We got into a huge discussion — The Theater Kids and The Jocks — and all of a sudden The Jocks started chanting “TOOTHBRUSH TOOTHBRUSH TOOTHBRUSH!” and I started crying. I ran up the stairs, tried to throw a swing at one of the Jocks and missed…and I walked up to a cop who was there, and the cop made me go to the front of the line. I was crying my eyes out as I graduated.

ISP: That’s a beautiful story. I used to be one of those jocks.

SP: Oh yea? I was a “naughty” friend to one of those jocks. He was cool, but he’d only talk to me in class. He told me all his perversions and I’d let him borrow my naughty XXX books.

ISP: I woulda been that guy.

SP: I wish I knew where he was now. He was really hot. I’d fuck him.

ISP: What’s the dumbest thing a director’s ever asked you to do?

SP: I went to set to watch a friend’s scene. I’d never seen a boy-girl scene. It was a boy-boy-girl scene. The girl showed up, and she was all cracked out. It was one of those dirty-mattress-in-a-room sets. I asked the director if I could sit around and watch. He offered me $100 to sit on camera and watch. I was going to play with myself anyway. So, the guys couldn’t get it up cause the girl was so nasty. I mean she was cracked. So I played with myself while they watched. It made them hard so they could fuck her. So they fucked her…and they filmed me playing with myself. I ended up on the box cover! And awhile later I met up with a friend of mine who was at a peepshow, and he saw my picture on the boxcover, went in and started dropping quarters into the machine, and kept putting more quarters thinking I was going to jump in.

ISP: But you never did!

SP: Nope! It’s fucking brilliant though.

ISP: It really was genius marketing. Put a hot girl on a box cover, and you can sell a crack whore movie without a problem! Do you watch porn?

SP: I do! I love fetish stuff. Lots of beating. Anal sex. Nasty stuff, too. Stuff like outside sex with flies buzzing around!

ISP: So you’re gonna love our trip to the Gloryhole!

SP: Sweet!

ISP: Wanna mention your site?

SP: Satine Phoenix. And soon SlaveSatine.com Satine Phoenix is about me as a slutty fashion model, porn star, and artist…and Slave Satine is about me being a slave and having doms beat me like I like to get beaten…and how the fans like me to be beaten.

ISP: Can I beat the shit out of you right now?

SP: OK!

Satine Phoenix'

Today’s Guest Blogger: Barbie Cummings (How I’ve Changed).

Barbie Cummings'

From time to time I have guests blog whatever it is they feel like blogging. I will not tell them what to blog; I won’t edit it; I won’t influence the Guest Blogger in any way.

Barbie Cummings. What can I say? I first met Barbie about six months ago when I booked her for Spunkmouth.com, and we’ve been friends ever since. I’ve shot her for JOMG, Eat Some Ass, Blacks on Blondes, and we’ve taken a trip to the Gloryhole; she’s also been on Manojob not once, not twice, but thrice. Some say she’s crazy, some say she’s hot…I say she’s a dirty, filthy slut. And that’s why I like her so; in addition, she gave me some pictures from her private life to post: the first is her first studio nude, and the second is a pic of her as a shooter girl, which she touches upon today.

I have to tell everyone reading right now that I was so very much excited about Billy Watson inviting me onto his blog. I am so excited about writing of all my lovely experiences, sexual escapades should say, throughout my life. “How I’ve Changed”… well let me begin with saying I wasn’t always a dirty whore. It started at a young age, a very young age that wouldn’t be safe to say on here, I will leave that to every pervy person reading this.

We’ll go by years, you can take it from there.

1986: Born.

2000: My first experience of all times. I, at the time, carried a nice rack of 34AA and wore braces. Me and my alcoholic, good for nothing so called mother went to a lovely, trashy tattoo parlor to get my naval pierced. We skipped a day of school, 9th grade to be exact, to what turned into finding the man that would take my virginity. I had all intentions on staying a virgin forever, because of course that would be the right thing to do. At the parlor we met a strapping man, age of 23. My mother flirted with him while I got probed in my belly button. My mother even took the liberty in inviting this man to our home later that week. Mike, Mike was his name. He wrote his phone number on a book of matches. I preceded to call Mike, not knowing what was in store. He came over later that week and took me to a shitty restaurant where we shared conversations about his school, his car, his life, etc.. We then went home to my house, where my mother invited him to stay the night. How exciting, a slumber party. We went to sleep, he asked me to sleep in just my panties and a white tank top, I agreed. I remember the feeling of laying there and the first time I felt him put his hands on me, I loved it. We had the black light on while he proceeded to slip his hand down my pink panties. He massaged my clit until my young, virgin pussy got soaked. I was a virgin but I was ready. I didn’t know exactly what to do so I did the same thing to him. I wrapped my hand around a cock for the first time and I loved it. He was only in boxers, but that didn’t last. He kissed on my double A breasts while finger fucking the tightest pussy he has ever encountered. There was no wasting time. My tank top was removed to reveal my young perky nipples and my panties pulled to the side. There was no asking, as he demanded me to get up, put one knee on each side of him and sit on his hard cock. It was a great size cock, in my opinion, about six or seven inches. I sat down slowly and boy did it hurt… it hurt so fucking good. I wanted more. I worked his dick, what I thought at the time, like a professional. I rode his cock, with my panties to the side until he came. You know the greatest part, this was a wonderful creampie! I was filled with cum and it was the greatest feeling ever. So… after that we had a few more sexual encounters, whenever I would get home from High School and my mother would have invited him over, nothing special. I later found out, not only was he fucking me but he was taking a turn on my mother too. How great is that? This all occurred when I resided in Peachtree City, GA. The days after my first experience I went out and fucked my very first black guy. I don’t generally admit to having experiences with black men before porn, because my former boyfriend would have flipped if he found out. So… since that is no longer here I am… I am openly admitting to have had 11 black sexual partners outside of porn.

2001: Not much later after my Mike experience I went to my very first party. I couldn’t drive, so once again my mother arranged for a ride from one of her lady friends who was also attending the party. I got to the party and everyone was at the least five to 10 years my senior. I was readily greeted by all the old men and offered my very first shot of liquor. I remember it was Tequila. I was given quite a few shots and I took them, just like all the big kids do! I ended up vomiting to the point where I thought I was going to die. I was drunk I remember removing my pants in the house with 20+ grown adults. I refused to put them back, there was no stopping me. I then decided I would lay down in the spare room. All I remember is waking up with two men coming in. I was eager to see what they wanted, it was no question. They were friends, I am assuming they knew each other, I have no clue what there name were. The took off my clothes and stuffed my mouth with their cocks. They decided to take turns making my a filthy whore. They tagged out as each one fucked me as hard as they could, I loved it. I can also recall that each one wanted me to punch them in the face while they spread my legs and filled me cock. I hit them, I hit both of them as hard as I could. It only made the fuck me harder. They came, they came all over me. I swallowed every drop that got in my mouth! They left. Thats not all. In the same night, maybe 30 minutes to three hours later a different man came in. I let him too have his way with me. He made me eat his cum. He left. Then again, another man followed… maybe they were drawing straws in the living room, but I didn’t care I loved it! He came in he fucked me, he filled me with cum. He fucked me one and two more times, all in which he filled me with cum. He left. I woke up the next day with a lovely headache and a cunt filled with cum. By the time I made it home, my panties were filled with all the cum I had been given and my mouth reeked of sperm!

2002: By this year I had turned into a filthy whore, which at the time I didn’t see anything wrong with. Wait… to think of it, I don’t see anything wrong with it now. I was into some legal trouble this year, already attending an alternative High School in Fayetteville, GA. I had been kicked out of school for fighting, I earned a simple battery charge for that. (She deserved it) I was given weekly drug tests. Well one week it just so happens that some how I failed… I should have studied! So, I was instructed to go home by my probation officer, and I was told to wait there. I was scheduled for court in the morning to be given my sentence for failing that damn test! Violation of Probation. Not me, I wasn’t going anywhere. There was a cop that drove by my house every hour from 10:00am until about 5:00pm. In between his drive bys I filled my car with clothing and shoes, I was leaving. After he drove by the last time, so did I. I drove straight to my friends house, C.C. was her name. We were leaving. We drove that night, from Peachtree City, GA all the way to Baton Rouge, LA. We got there that night, late and at the International House of Pancakes. Where we in fact met two lovely men, older gentlemen. They took us under their wings. The very first night, was introduced to Ecstasy. I had the very best sex, with the very best stranger. Me and my friend C.C. shared these two men. These two men had their way me the both of us anytime and as often as they pleased. I loved it. We ended up moving on to other men during our three week trip. There was one we met at the gas station, I thought he was so attractive I gave him oral pleasure in his car, behind the gas station. I don’t remember his name, I don’t care. I later got caught, when pulled over for a speeding ticket, and was escorted all the way back to the Macon Youth Detention Center in Macon, GA. I served my four months and moved on.

2003: During this year I gave up on one night stands and explored that of what was referred to as “cuddy buddies”. I had lots of cuddy buddies. The one that sticks out the most in my mind is Jake. Jake only preferred anal sex. He introduced me for the first time to anal sex. The only way we had sex was in my little virgin ass hole, I loved it. He also was the first to video tape me. He would video tape me while I sucked his dick, as he sat in the chair in front of his computer. He lived in Atlanta, which was about a 35 maybe 45 minute drive. I would drive to his apartment about three to four times a week to take his big load in my ass hole. Sometimes we would have anal sex up to six times a night. The best part is that I got a girlfriend of mine, my very best friend at the time, Nicole to go and experience this lovely man. He fucked her in the pussy while I watched and video taped. We loved it. I moved to Knoxville, TN.

2004: Now, living in Knoxville, TN I was determined to calm down. I didn’t. I met a man my very first month living in Tennessee. His name was Eric, he was a car salesman, he was great. He took me to his apartment the first night I met him. We cooked chicken and watched basketball. I told myself it wouldn’t be sex on the first night, I lied. We had sex five times that night. His cock was the biggest cock I have ever experienced in my life. He was mixed, his mother white, father black. He was hung. All I remember was him laying me on my stomach and putting my face into the pillow as he hurt me with his, at the least, 10 inch cock. It hurt so bad. I loved it. He too creampied me. He creampied me for a few months. Then it was onto the next.

2005: This was a great year. I started working at a bar in what is called the Old City, in downtown Knoxville. I was a shooter girl. I walked around in close to nothing, gave men lap dances and shots of liquor from my own mouth. Everyone who worked at this club “partied”. I partied with them. The greatest night had to be, and I remember the exact date, December 17th. It was the Christmas Party. Oh, I need to mention the whole time I was working there I was having sex with the manager, Manuel. He was a married man, but no one knew. I only fucked him when I worked. He would take me in the back of the store where all the liquor was kept and bend me over the table or up against the wall. I was creampied every time. Back to the Christmas party. There was a stripper hired, she was sexy. I decided to join, it turned into me eating here pussy in front of everyone. I let he keep all the tips. We then headed to the club across the street to a dance club where I danced my ass on stage. I danced with my new addition of breasts, now a 34D, hanging out and my skirt up. I went with my friend that night, Charlotte. We were approached by two gentlemen. I don’t remember their names. They offered each of us 200$ to have sex with each other, while they watched. We agreed. We licked each other and finger fucked each other in this mans apartment while each one watched. We even allowed them to put a finger in, here and there. We then gave each one a lap dance, over their pants we grinded. We grinded until they both came. We left. Charlotte went home, I went to my friend Andrea and Brads apartment. We had a threesome. I got fucked by her boyfriend while I ate her pussy. He came three times, it was great! He had me bent over, on my knees fucking me while I ate her pussy. He came in me. He drove me to where my car was left in the parking lot of the club I worked at. Well, how coincidental, when we pulled out, the owner Manuel and his lovely wife. This was a great opportunity. They jumped at the opportunity when I offered to have sex with both of them. We all three went upstairs in the club, in the office and disrobed each other. I ate her pussy, just like I had earlier ate Charlottes and Andreas! He fucked me. When he fucked me his cock was hard, when he had fucked his wife, he couldnt keep it hard. Her pussy isn’t as nice as mine. He came. They left. I was too tired to drive home and was left to sleep upstairs on the sofa, in the office. I slept and went home the next day.

2006: This is the year I discovered the world of pornography. I was approached on my personal MySpace account, which I later made one for my porno career… My Barbie Cummings MySpace account.. I was asked I had every considered in working in the adult industry. I said no. I hadn’t ever thought about that, ever. Six weeks later I was in Los Angeles for the very first time. We went to AIM, where I was tested for STD’s, and then we went on “Go See’s”. These Go See’s consisted of meeting producers, porno producers. My first scene was set up when a producer called my agent, because the original girl he had booked didn’t show up. My first scene was a Double Penetration. It was a for a movie, “Internal Discharge #3”. I took two dicks at once, one in each hole for the very first time. It was great. I straddled John Strong while Brian Surewood probed my tight ass hole. They were both creampies! I loved it.

2007: It is still earlier in the year but I recently had a wonderful experience. I got to fulfill one of my ultimate fantasies, and I got paid to do so. I was paid to put a big strap-on on and make a man bend over at take it in his ass hole. He loved it. I will fantasize about this experience when my lame boyfriends at home do their best to fuck me. I will cum thinking about the look on his face when I made him take it.

Well… I am headed home in the morning, headed back to Knoxville, TN. I hope you enjoyed my life, if you don’t… well, I don’t care. Mwah! xoxo…Barbie Cummings.

Write me! Barbie_CummingsXXX (at) yahoo (dot) com!

Barbie Cummings'

Lorilei Lee Ate Some Ass. And So Did Lefty.

Lorilei Lee

Who says you can’t have a little fun while you’re working?

Who says porno has to be scripted?

Lorilei Lee is our most recent update over at Eat Some Ass. I think I told you lately I’ve been all about hiring a bunch of dicks for a girl to blow, versus hiring one dick to fuck the girl. This week Lorilei takes on three dicks, and she did a great job sucking dick and eating ass.

Check out one of my favorite pervs of all time — Lefty. He’s eating Clare Dames’s ass.

Why’s Lefty eating ass off camera? And what’s Clare Dames doing there?

Lefty’s a total and utter pervert, and he’ll be the first to admit it. Clare was shooting across the hall at my pal Nicky’s studio. She was all done, and hanging out, and my PA, Cherry Poppens, was off running errands, so I asked Clare if she’d lend me a hand and hold the C-Light for me.

She did, for a bit.

Then she ended up getting groped by the pervs on my set — that’s Rocker X behind them, laughing his ass off. Clare’s laughing, too. And why not? Lefty’s using his tongue like a piece of toilet paper, and I’m sure Clare finds it more amusing than sexually stimulating.

Of course Lorilei’s on set, eating Alex Gunz’s ass.

Funny how serendipitous porn often is…and certainly all good porn is exactly that: an act of serendipity.

Didn’t count on a pornographer to use fancy words now, did ya?

Better yet, image a porno girl who can use fancy words, too…and line them up all nice and pretty in paragraph after paragraph.

If you don’t believe me, just click on Lorilei’s picture below.

Lorilei Lee

Spunkmouth Kinzy Jo

Kinzy Jo

I’ve been told, over and over, that the more dicks you throw into a scene, the happier you make the porno consumer. I’ve even had debates with some producers that it’s better to toss in a whole bunch of dicks and just have the girl suck them than to just have one dick in the scene — even if she fucks the dick.

I tend to agree with the “more dicks the better” theory, and, in fact, I’ve officially named it: The More Dicks The Better is now a porno rule that I follow, even if she isn’t fucking all the dicks on set.

Say hello to Kinzy Jo, the latest porno slut featured on Spunkmouth.com.

Here’s a quick, funny story: I can’t remember how many mopes I had some in to drop a load on Kinzy, but one of them was having some trouble. He had shown up late, and was kinda hanging out on the back of the set, and struggled from the time he got there. In fact, he struggled so much, he just disappeared…in fact, I thought he went home after I didn’t see him on set.

He didn’t go home at all. In fact, after the scene was shot, and Kinzy was about to clean up, I heard a scream from another set: GET READY GET READY I’M ABOUT TO BLOW!

I had even turned my camera off, cause I thought we were done, so I jumped to grab it just as my final load dumper stormed on set, dick in hand, to let Kinzy have it right in the kisser.

And let her have it he did!

After he unloaded, Kinzy laughed. “That was a drive-by pop shot for sure!” she said.

It’s the kinda thing I wish I woulda said.

Super Fun E-Mails.

Jacky Joy

John writes:

I’ve often wonder if the myth of the porn starlet as an insatiable nymphomaniac who enters adult industry as a means of satisfaction is nothing more than a myth. Obviously, none of these girls would be doing what they do if it wasn’t for the pay but, I can’t help thinking (or maybe that’s hoping) that some of these girls really are insatiable nymphos. I would understand given what they do for a profession if sex is the furthest thing from these girls’ minds when the cameras off. However, I’ve heard stories of some these starlets blowing random strangers and being up for sex at a moment’s notice and of course when the camera’s on a starlet will always tell you how much she can’t get enough of sex. So I guess my question is have you actually encountered any of these girls? Do they really exist? Or are they just a myth?

John

Hey John!

Funny you should e-mail me this, cause almost to the day I got your e-mail, Jacky Joy called me up to say howdy and all that, and then she went on to tell me what a “nymph” she’s been lately. Her words, not mine. The conversation went something like this:

“Oh Billy, I’ve been such a little nymph lately. I’m fucking everyone I work with – girls and boys – as well as this cute boy who’s about to go to Iraq, and blah blah blah I’m such a nymph blah blah I’m horny all the time blah blah I’ve been so naughty blah blah blah but I LOVE it! blah blah blah…”

(Jacky Joy just visited my studio! Look at the BTS pics! I know how much the fans love BTS! We made another handjob movie! In fact, Jacky’s one of my favorite nymphs of all time…the other being Maggie, my Golden Retriever.)

I know it’s hard to imagine there are women who have the same kind of sex drive as a man, but some do. So, John, the “myth”, so to speak, is somewhat a reality.

But that’s not really what makes a girl get into porn, you know?

In fact, if I were to make a list of the top 5 reasons a girl gets into making dirty movies, here’s what it would look like:

5) They got a whole bunch of hard core fundamentalist religion crammed down their throat during their formative years, and, to top it off, a whole bunch of insanely strict rules to go along with their insane theology.

4) They got almost no attention whatsoever from their fucked-up parents.

3) Taking it even one step further, either mom or dad were completely null & void in their life — usually Dad.

2) They are promiscuous. (Which is a direct result from the lack of attention they received growing up, some sort of sexual abuse they received while growing up, or they really are horny all the time, which means they absolutely love sex, and, hence, are insatiable nymphs. Feel free to combo any and all in #2 — or let any single reason stand by itself).

1) Porn money is Easy Money! (But not so easy…but that’s another blog itself).

Remember, John, this is by no means a complete list, and you can combine any of the above to create your favorite porno gal. I also didn’t mention things like the girls who party too much, the girls who were adopted (which may or may not relate to numbers 4 and 5, the girls who are really lazy and love the idea of laying on their back for 2 hours a day as “work”, as well as the people in this world that simply cannot do a typical 9 to 5 thing behind a desk and have discovered sex as a business.

I’ve encountered them all…which is to say none of it is really a “myth”, is it?

In addition, I’m not making any sort of claims about Jacky Joy specifically…like I said earlier, she just called the same time I got your e-mail, and I took some fun pics of her behind the scenes, and I thought you’d like to see them.

Did I just ruin it all for you?

Cause if I did, I’m sorry.

Ignorance is bliss, eh?

Your pal — Billy

Jacky Joy

Bree Olson in the Gloryhole

Bree Olson

Bree Olson just turned 20.

She’s last week’s Gloryhole.com update.

Bree admitted to me how filthy and dirty the gloryhole is, but Bree’s a dirty girl, so a filthy, dirty adult bookstore peepshow is just the place for Bree.

Since Bree is only 20, I had to grease Abe, the manager of the store, in order to get her in the door. It cost me 50 bucks.

50 smackers.

50 doll hairs.

During the pre-gloryhole blowjob, I usually ask the girls what kind of porn they watch – if they watch porn at all.

Some do.

Some don’t.

Watch porn, that is.

Bree does, and guess what? She likes watching gangbang porn the best.

Like I said, such a filthy, naughty girl — just look at the smile on her face getting ready to step up to the hole.

Just the kinda girl I wanna settle down with and call my own.